I decided to get the jump on NZ television by watching the first few episodes of Heroes. Oh, sorry, HEROES. God, it's awful. Horrible, horrible scifi. Let's see. Well, it starts off with this text scrolling up the screen:
In recent days, a seemingly random group of individuals has emerged with what can only be described as "special" abilities.

Although unaware of it now, these individuals will not only save the world, but change it forever. This transformation from ordinary to extraordinary will not happen overnight. Every story has a beginning.

Volume One of their epic tale begins here...
I wish I was kidding. No, really, that's the very first thing you'll see when you watch Heroes. You know it's going to be good when the show itself is telling you it's an 'epic tale', and stealing lines from Star Wars Episode One. Ugh.

Unfortunately, it only gets worse. The titles and locations are in an awful font, that contrasts so badly with the main title card that you'd have to wonder what the hell they were paying the art director for (or whoever should have been making damn sure that just didn't happen). Just three minutes in we're told that cockroaches are more evolved than us. You know, they might not have recursive language, introspection or self awareness, but hey, their cells divide only once every two weeks, so if they're lucky they're resistant to radiation. Those wacky cockroaches. And then ten seconds later...
SURESH: They say that man uses only a tenth of his brainpower; another percent and we might actually be worthy of God's image. Unless of course that day has already arrived.
Well, 'they' say lots of things, don't they. Haven't you heard? Water drains the other way in this hemisphere!

What were the writers thinking? Oh, I know, I'll use my super mind reading powers to tell you. They were thinking: "Hey, let's make something like that LOST show. That's cool, right? All the kids like that. Only, we'll put in a cheerleader, because then we'll draw the 13 year old boys. Oh, and a online stripper being chased by the mob for an expired loan she took out to put her gifted son (Walt?) into a private school. And we'll put in a tortured artist with a drug problem just for fun (Charlie?)."

This program is utter shit. Apart from Hiro; he can stay. He's the only one with any sense at all (tip: if you're going to be a superhero, it helps to know your comics), and he's got the best power too. It's a shame I'm not going to sit through all the rest of this show's bilge just to see how his storyline turns out (although I hear there are some casino scenes a bit further in).

Oh well. This show is based on the superhero comic book thing. So, I'm hoping there'll be a Tru Calling universe tie-in.


oh man. thank god the blasted thing has started. i'm so sick of those retarded bus stop advertisements that omit the show's title, opting instead for some flippant line that i guess should leave me begging for more. hmm... mysterytensiontensiontensionoopsieLET DOWN.